Unforgettable Acts of Stupidity From Real People

Not the Father

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My girlfriend at the time, C, lived with her friend, K who was not the sharpest tool in the shed. I would always be there hanging out and somehow, I got sucked into Days of Our Lives.

I know, stupid, but hey, being forced to watch it weekly made me invested in the characters to a degree. So, in the show, Sammy and Lucas are the star-crossed lovers.

They’re not always together throughout the show, but they find their way back to each other. In this story of mine, they have been set back together, and they’re still working things out.

BUT, wait! There’s a handsome, young Englishman named EJ who just moved into town. Sammy ends up having a one-night stand with him. Oh dear!

Two weeks later we find out on Days of Our Lives that Sammy is pregnant! We wonder whose kid it was. Then K pipes in and says, “This is so stupid.” I, knowing that this will be good, ask her, “oh?

why do you think that?” She says, “There’s no tension. This is dumb.” Well, we had to know why, so I ask, “why is that, K?” Her answer was priceless.

She explains, “Well, they’re going to know whose baby it is if it comes out with a British accent or not.” I put the TV on mute and say, “I’m sorry.

One more time.” K looks at me like I have two heads and says, “like this -standard cry- or like this -Disney stereotype of a chimney cleaner in London losing his wife to typhoid-.” I just go, “nope,” and walk out.

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