“Do You Work Here?” Awkward Stories Of Being In The Wrong Place At The Wrong Time

Too Close To Home

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So basically, I live in a small apartment above a bar that has a really good kitchen. Over time I’ve become friends with the owners, who are really great people.

This past weekend, there was lots of noise coming from the bar at about midnight, so I came to complain. They said they couldn’t do much about the noise (it was a crowd watching a game) but if I came in at some point this week, they’d give me dinner for free as an apology.

That brings us to yesterday. I’d gotten off work late and didn’t feel like cooking, so decided to cash in that aforementioned free dinner. As I’m eating things start to get really loud and busy again, so I ask for my meal to be put into a to-go container.

The owner said I could just take the plate upstairs, as long as I return it later that night or the next day.

As I’m leaving, still shoveling fries into my mouth, I notice a woman trying to flag me down from her table. I assumed she was looking at a server behind me, so I took no notice and walk outside, carrying my dinner.

I put down the plate to open my door, and while I’m rooting through my pocket I feel a sharp tap on the shoulder.

Lady: “Don’t just ignore me like that! I ordered almost 40 minutes ago and I’ve not got my food! This is unacceptable!” This can’t be true, considering even when it’s packed I’ve never waited longer then 30.

Lady: “What do you mean OK?! What are you going to do about it? I want my meal discounted for this!” Me: “Oh! I don’t work there, you’ll need to speak to someone who does about doing that!”

Lady: “Don’t lie to me!” (Looks past me, up the stairs) “I know you guys are just hiding up there instead of working! I’d like to speak to the owner!” Me: “Lady, this is my apartment, please leave me alone.” I’m holding door open while I bend over to pick up my meal.

The lady pushes past me and charges up the stairs, screaming as she goes: “YOU GUYS BETTER GET BACK TO WORK – THERE ARE PEOPLE WAITING TO BE SERVED DOWN HERE!”

At this point she’s reached the top of the stairs and is now looking around my room, realising the only person she was yelling to was my fish, who I’m sure wasn’t in any mood to serve her anything after that. Me: “See!?

Get the heck out of my apartment!” I’m angry, tired and fantasizing about the burger on the plate in my hand.

Lady: “Well, it doesn’t change the fact that I’ve been waiting ages for my food and that’s unacceptable. Clearly (looks at my plate) you know the owners so I think you should still talk to them for me!” Me: “What the heck?

Get out!” I’m out of patience at this point, and begin to walk towards her and try to usher her back down the stairs. Lady: “DONT TOUCH ME!

IF YOU DON’T CARE I’LL FIND SOMEONE WHO DOES!”

She ran back down the stairs and slammed the door on the way out, however not before kicking a pair of my shoes into the street, which I then had to go out and collect.

I saw the owner today when I gave the plate back, and he said the lady had come back down and caused a scene in the bar.

Eventually the bouncer removed her.

I couldn’t believe she still tried to act like she was right, even after she realised she was standing in my apartment, not a restaurant.

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