Let’s Take a Look
My co-worker, and absolute hero, maliciously complied at security on one of our subcontractor jobs. The customer was a manufacturer for high-end electronic components. Security was tight, as a small 4″ x 6″ box could contain $250,000 worth of microchips. Our team was installing equipment in their facility for one week. A security checkpoint had to be passed every trip in or out of the building.
Mr. Security Guard, Chad, decided my co-worker, Steve, was more suspicious than the other four techs. So every trip in or out, not only was Steve made to dump the entire contents of his backpack out on the table and go through it, Chad also required Steve to show him the last five pictures taken on his phone “to prove he wasn’t taking secrets.”
This is all fine, except Chad lets everyone else through without any sort of inspection. Steve is trying to stay positive, but obviously, this is eating away at him. Steve tries to be overly positive and also a bit snarky with comments like “Thank you Paul Blart, for keeping America safe,” which busts up the rest of our crew. Then, Steve has the idea that will free him the rest of the week.
Wednesday comes along, and Steve is overly scrutinized on our way in as usual. As we head to security at lunch, Steve says he has to go to the bathroom. He comes back out a few minutes later, absolutely giddy. Chad Blart, mall cop, stops us on our way out and asks Steve to see his camera roll. Steve gladly hands the phone over. Chad is greeted by some very peculiarly angled shots of Steve’s bare butt.
“What the heck?” Chad throws the phone down on the table. “Oh, sorry. I thought I had a hemorrhoid and wanted to see how bad it was. Is everything ok with my pictures? Is the facility safe?” Chad never checked Steve’s materials again. Good on you Steve.