It’s My Party And I’ll Cry If I Want To
My dad and I are currently on our way to a big Mexican birthday party and he likes to talk about ol’ back-in-the-day stories. Now I’ve heard each of these a few times over but got a new one I never heard about. I wasn’t born yet in this story and my older brother was only a few years old. My dad was freshly dating my mom. My mom and brother were living at my grandma’s house, my dad’s mother-in-law.
My mom called my dad crying because the mother-in-law was taking over my brother’s milestone birthday party. Nothing was how my mom wanted it: Decorations, food, and worst, who was invited. Specifically, awful family members planned to show up who hadn’t spoken a kind word to my mom since she became a “sinful” single mother with no husband.
My mom tried pleading to her mother not to let these horrible people crash her party and was given the title line. The answer was vicious. “You can’t tell me who I can’t invite to my own house. These are my family members. They are always welcome in my house”. So my mom called my dad crying, dreading this party and knowing she’s going to be insulted in front of her own son.
My mom kept trying to think of ways to stop these people from showing up but my dad shut that down. His words mirrored his mother-in-law—that’s her house and you have to follow her rules. But then my dad followed this with, “Do you want me to fix this?” And my mom agreed. So my dad made a bunch of calls and organized a pizza party in less than 12 hours.
All of his cousins brought their kids, many my brother’s age. It was a big, fun thing. My parents never told my grandma about the change of plans. She threw her party her way with her guest list and no birthday boy. My mom and brother came home late in the evening and the decorations were still up. My grandma was so angry and demanded to know where she had been.
My mom said her new boyfriend stressed the importance of respecting her mother’s rules so they simply took the party elsewhere. To this day my dad still stresses the importance of respect and rules. He never argues or tells someone they are doing things wrong. But if he sees something he doesn’t like he either never shows up, or leaves early and distances himself from the nonsense.