One-Upper
A woman I work with literally stole this great story that I tell about me being in the same hospital at the same time that my niece was born. She tells it as if it was her husband, and she was in the hospital giving birth. She’s a known one-upper, everything you do she did it better, faster, it was worse for her, etc.
So, it didn’t surprise me when a co-worker told me she regularly tells clients that story. Now, every single day as I get in, I pour a tiny bit of my water bottle out on her desk, chair, or on the carpet somewhere in her office. In my mind, mold is slowly growing in her office, her skirt gets wet when she sits down, or any fresh documents she puts on her desk get sat right in the small puddle of water.
Story credit: Reddit / b8le