Making a Good First Impression Is Hard
In high school, I was a classic geek—all limbs and awkwardness. Part of an advanced honors class, there was a clear divide between students who were finding it easy and those who were struggling.
I was pretty much right in the middle, while this interesting girl named Ann found the workload pretty tough. She had this beautiful hair and a figure that had all the guys chatting, even though I’d never spoken to her since she seemed to be part of the popular crowd. One day, one of her friends, coincidentally quite good looking too, awkwardly approached me in class.
She didn’t seem to get my hints when I tried clarifying I wanted alone time with my book. Quite bluntly then, she informed me that Ann found me attractive and wanted to get to know me better.
Being the odd-one-out and not part of the ‘cool group’, I immediately suspected some prank. My mind raced, is she asking for homework help or setting me up for public humiliation?
Unable to remember word-for-word, I do remember responding harshly, loud enough for Ann to hear and then criticizing her quite severely. This resulted in the friend storming off, close to tears, shouting something along the lines of regretting having suggested that Ann reach out to me. Turning to Ann, she too seemed rather upset.
Oddly enough, in my freshman year, my lanky appearance had begun to fill out a bit, as I’d gained about 30lbs. But my self-perception remained that of the geeky, skinny kid. Looking back at Ann, she did seem genuinely kind and smart, even though she found this advanced class rather taxing.
She wasn’t the type to be cruel with her friends and seemed to actually appreciate a good intellect. On later reflection, I realized I had completely botched my very first romantic overture. My lack of self-belief clouded my thinking.
I was viewed as worthy by one of the most attractive girls in school but my insecurities sabotaged that potential connection.