Black Sheep
My wife’s grandmother passed suddenly. Now, my wife wasn’t the “Golden Child” by any stretch, but her cousin is. The Golden Child had a baby with some cracked-out loser while she was cracked out then ended up in lockup a couple times.
My wife was the “Black Sheep” for dying her hair and piercing her nose. I married such a badass.
When the Golden Child found out about her grandma’s passing, she threw a total freaking hissy fit over the phone from lockup about how embarrassing it’ll be to show up in shackles…As if there’s something anyone who’s not a judge can do to change that.
The Golden Child decided that she just won’t show. Well, the day of the service comes and we hear the distinct clanking of shackles coming in.
Here comes the Golden Child in shackles and guards and sits right in front of us. She then has her kid who was about three years old playing all in the pews. The kid wouldn’t shut up and the cracked-out mom wouldn’t do anything.
This dynamic duo wrecked the moment of silence, the prayers, the eulogy, and the procession. So, in short, don’t do crack and show up to a funeral in shackles. It’ll embarrass even the prison guards.
Story credit: Reddit / medicff