Forbidden Love
I’m in love with the daughter of my ex-girlfriend, who I’ve known since she was 12. I wish that was it—it’s not. I remained involved with her mother for eight years purely because I couldn’t bear the thought of never seeing her daughter again for that entire time. There have been three occasions when I believe something could have happened if I had pushed it.
Once was when she was underage and twice since she was older. I believe she has similar feelings for me to some extent at least, although we have never spoken about it at all. I am around 10 years older than her; I was several years younger than her mother. I don’t have a problem meeting women, I’ve always had a girlfriend etc.
When I don’t see the daughter for a while I talk myself out of my emotions, then as soon as I see her again and as soon as she smiles at me once I am completely overwhelmed by an almost unbearable desire for her. I haven’t acted on it because I respect her mother and wouldn’t want to do that to her. I believe the daughter feels something similar.
Even though I’ve now broken up with the mother I have attempted to remain some kind of friends with her because I don’t want to accept that I will never see the daughter again. I think about her quite a bit and I find it impossible for any other girl to measure up to the feelings I have for her. I know it’s kind of messed up that I’ve felt this way since she was 12, but I’ve never done anything inappropriate and I never would.
Just being around her made wasting my time and her mother’s with the relationship I maintained worthwhile. Which I know is a terrible thing for me to say and do. I almost certainly won’t ever indulge in any real involvement with her. These thoughts are pointless. I just wanted to confess the truth for once. I’ve never told anyone anything about it.