Unanswered Questions
One time, my stepfather shouted at my mom that he had been looking for a way out of the relationship for ten years. He didn’t know I could hear. I was ten years old at the time. I spent the first few years of my life living with my mom and bio dad, meaning that my mom was with my stepdad for at least part of the time she was with my dad.
Clearly, they had something together that my stepdad couldn’t just walk away from. Years later, in my 20s, my mom had been drinking or something and was bashing my stepdad. They had divorced by this point. That’s when she said something I’ll never forget. She referred to him as “The sperm donor, since that’s the only thing he ever did for us”.
She was talking about my stepdad, not my dad. I’m in my 30s now. We lost my dad years ago, my stepdad is out of the picture. My mom has cleaned up her life…but I have these memories. I’m pretty sure my mom and dad divorced because she cheated on him, and I don’t know for sure who my real dad is. I’m not even sure my brother is my full brother.
Whatever happened back then, though, my bio dad knew, and he never said anything, but I had no doubt in my mind that he loved me and in my mind, he will always be my father.