Did You Do Your Homework?
When I was 12 years old, my mother took me to a therapist. I did actually need therapy because I had a horrible home life, but my mother didn’t take me for that type of reason. She took me because I was “acting out” and getting bad grades. I wasn’t “acting out” though.
I was wanting to do things like “read” and “be a kid,” and not do things like “take care of my younger siblings” and “cook meals.”
On our first session, my mom started outlining my many flaws, some of which were obviously a sign that I was having trouble at home, such as never wanting to come out of my room and having a hard time with hygiene. The therapist started making faces like I’m nasty and worthless.
He gave me “homework” that week. I had to bathe every day, help with chores and siblings with no complaints, and study every night. Of course this didn’t happen. So the next week, we went in for our second session, and he asked if I did my “homework.”
Of course, Mom immediately told him that I didn’t even try to do any of it. This was not true. I did try to study but she kept dragging me out of my room and lecturing me for “hiding again” when I should be cooking dinner. She told me she did so much for me and I was so ungrateful, etc.
This is when the therapist nearly made my heart stop. He turned, looked at me, and said, “You’re worthless, stupid, and lazy. You can’t even follow simple instructions.” Then he looked at my mother and said, “You may as well give up on her. She’s never going to amount to anything.
She’s stupid and lazy and will end up locked away. Just focus on your other kids.” Ironically, that ticked my mother right off and she took me away from that therapist and found a new one. This therapist was nicer, but really of no help either.
My issues were right there, flashing in neon, but he never did anything about it. Mom stuck with him though, because he would let her vent. She used him as her therapist more than I did.
He kept reassuring her she really was a good parent, which is really what she wanted to hear. To this day, she insists she took me away from that first therapist because he said to give up on me, but she would never give up on me.
This is partly true, but we didn’t leave because he was horrible to me. It was because by saying I was worthless and would never be worth anything and to give up on me, he was calling HER a bad parent. Story credit: Reddit / CoyotePatronus