Sleezeball Excuse
Buddy was married with two young children, who was unable to get away from his job, wife and kids. His wife is also a bit of a helicopter wife if that makes sense. My buddy and I have a bond over baseball, hadn’t seen him in a long time so we went to a Blue Jays game.
During the game his wife constantly texted him reminding he had to come straight home, when was the game going to be over. My buddy stated “It’s a Saturday afternoon, I haven’t seen you in ages or been out in a while, I want to go to a pub after for drinks but need an excuse that will give me an extra hour or two.
On Saturdays , the Jays would have Jr. Jays Saturdays, where 45 minutes after the game , if you were 12 and under, you could wait in a long line and run the bases.
I told my buddy to tell his wife that I was trying to hit on a hot single mom who had a baby but also a 4 year old who wanted to the run bases and offered to take the 4 year old around the bases with the intent to get her number.
Mission accomplished as we headed after the game for a couple beers. A month later I was at his house and the first thing his wife says to me, “you are such a pathetic sleezeball!” Story credit: Reddit / OMC78