Sally The Snob
I was on my high school’s newspaper staff and we always did a section on cars in the parking lot, where we highlighted one old beater and one super nice car and then interviewed both owners. Everyone loved it—and don’t worry, the owners of the beaters were always super excited to be a part of it and they always had the best stories.
So we pick Snobette Snootyson because she’s got a nice brand new Range Rover or something, and after I’m the last to call “not it” I’m forced to interview her. I asked her what was her favorite feature of the car? “Well one time I forgot to put it in park and it started rolling away, but it didn’t roll that fast so probably that. Or my G-Eazy bumper sticker.”
Then I asked, “Got any funny stories about your car?” “Yeah!” she exclaimed. “When my parents first got me it, I was making faces at my friend and turned left when it wasn’t a green arrow and totaled it. So they got me the same one again!” I managed to sneak into the article: “Snootyson has managed to keep her car undamaged since October.” It was January.
Story credit: Reddit