Stuff Of Legends
My grandma didn’t drive. I thought she couldn’t, but it was just never discussed.
One day when I was maybe 7-8, I’d been trying to get someone, anyone to drive me to the store for candy. We were visiting my aunt and uncle, grandma lived with them. They had Bit-O-Honey at the local store, which I could no longer get at home. But no one would take me to the store.
Finally I said I’d just ask grandma, and my cousin chimes in with, “Grandma can’t drive.”
“Oh you bet your sweet *beep* I can drive. They just don’t let me!” Grandma had overheard and she was in high dudgeon. But that’s all that was said about it, and my aunt finally took me to the store, so I forgot about it.
Years later, when I’d just gotten my license, I asked my mom what was up with Grandma not driving. She explained that during prohibition grandma boot-legged alcohol for moonshiners. She was very successful at it.
She was so successful at it that when the moonshiners were finally busted, even though the revenuers never caught my grandma, her license was suspended by the state “to never be reissued.” Later in life she was told she could petition for it back but it came with an admission of guilt or some such. She told ’em to beat it.