It’s Not a Crime to Talk
Our neighbor was a pain in the butt. He would call the authorities on us even if we were just standing in our yard, minding our own business.
He didn’t have a mental problem; he was just a jerk who thought calling 9-1-1 would scare us. We would hear him on the phone saying, “They’re standing in their yard, talking again.”
The officers would often apologize for coming by, explaining that they had no choice but to respond to the complaints. Sometimes, they would just drive by and wave to us while shaking their heads.
So one night, we had enough. We bought a thousand-count string of firecrackers, made a makeshift fuse, put it in his garage, and waited. Needless to say, it was super lit.
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