No One to Blame But the Birds
We briefly had a neighbor who was a complete jerk. My personal pet peeve was when he would yell at our kids to “shut up” while they were playing in the backyard.
Next to his driveway was a big tree and I noticed he’d throw occasional hissy fits over the birds defecating on his car. One week, he was out of town but his car was still in the driveway.
Each day, I put a heaping pile of berries (blueberries, strawberries, etc.) next to the tree. He returned home to a car absolutely COVERED in technicolor bird poop.
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