35. UNDONE BY THE PANTY RAID
I went to her 18th birthday party. I wandered around mingling with all her friends, and then I realized I hadn’t seen her anywhere in like 45 minutes.
I thought nothing of it at first, but then I went downstairs to use the basement bathroom. It was locked. I knocked, and I heard a very breathy female voice say, “Occupied! Go Away!” Since I really had to go, I decided to wait.
GF came stumbling out of the bathroom with some guy about ten minutes later, looking all flustered and stinking of really cheap weed. Apparently, the guy bought himself a bathroom quickie with a few hits of a crummy toke.
She made some excuse about how they were “just talking” and he was an old friend. I shrugged, actually wanting to believe her. But when I went in to finally take a leak, the stupid girl had forgotten her panties on the bathroom floor. I handed them to her in front of all her friends upstairs and walked out.
“Here. You forgot these in the bathroom downstairs.” It was one of those classic zinger moments when you really burned someone, but at the time, I just felt sick and brokenhearted.