Dump and Run
Friend of mine is a manager in a supermarket. Apparently elderly people shoplift more than young people. He told me stories of how he would witness an older woman hiding a ham under her dress and trying to walk out of the store.
He stopped her and went to call the police. She ended up pooping herself. He was so surprised, he just let her go. But this is apparently the “go-to” strategy when old people get caught stealing. Story credit: Reddit / holycowpies