Let Me Rephrase This
My son has autism—level 1, what was previously called Asperger’s. Due to that, he also has a psychiatrist, multiple psychologists, and many doctors. We decided to get a new primary doctor who works closely with his other providers to better coordinate his care this past summer. I brought my son in for a standard “well child” visit, and spent nearly an hour with this new doctor going over his issues, medications, history, etc.
Toward the end of the visit she says to me, “Well, he can get the gardasil vaccine today,” to which I reply, joking, “Oh, no he can’t have that, I don’t want him to get autism.” I should maybe note here that I am an aspie too, and while I think my sarcasm is on point, I must have been a little too serious looking because she just stared at me.
The silence lasted an eternity while I imagine she was deciding how to proceed. Eventually, I laughed and tried to assure her I was only kidding, but she only returned a nervous-sounding chuckle and left the room. As my son and I were discussing whether I was offensive (he thought I was hilarious) in walked the nurse with a stack of information about vaccines.
He started his lecture about vaccine safety and potential risks, etc. and no amount of my assurances that we are not in fact anti-vax would stop him. He just kept saying, “Okay, well I have to tell you this,” in a way that suggested that the doctor told him to give me the full spiel. For what it’s worth, of course we took the gardasil that day.
Shout out to Nurse Pete for being the first nurse to ever give my kid a vaccine without him crying or fist-fighting everyone. I wish everyone could have a Nurse Pete.