Standing Up For Yourself
My son was born with a condition called Pectus Excavatum. In layman’s terms, his chest is sunken in. His condition was so bad that he only had two and a half inches between his sternum and his spine, and his heart and lungs were bruised because of it. In December, he had surgery to correct it and they put two nickel bars in his chest to give it space and train his bones to grow correctly.
About three weeks after his surgery, a kid punched him and dislodged the top bar and he had to have another surgery to put the bar back in place. The kid has been through a lot. Well, the doctor cleared him for most activity last week, just no skateboarding or bike riding, but he could now lift his backpack and go hang out with friends and play pick-up, or non-contact sports.
Unbeknownst to me, a kid in his class had been teasing him all semester. And because my son was afraid of getting hit again, he just took it. Well, the evening he was cleared he came to me and said, “Dad, I’m cleared now. A kid has been hitting me for months. Can I kick his butt?” Well, my son isn’t really a fighter. He’s fought with his brothers but never anyone else, and he’s always gotten his butt kicked.
So I just figured he was just talking. But this is the first I had heard about the kid and I was concerned. I could tell he was distressed about the situation, so I told him to knock the guy out. He just nodded and went to his room. Now, his older brother is a tough guy. He had a traumatic brain injury two years ago and he missed a year of school so he’s in the same grade and coincidentally takes the same class.
I talked to him about it and told him to handle it but don’t get in trouble. He told me that the kid walks in every day and punches my son in the head. I asked him why he allowed that to happen and he said he wanted his brother to get tough and once he was tired of getting hit, he would do something about it. While I kind of agree with his thinking, I instructed him to handle it without getting in trouble.
The next morning I took them both to school, then drove back home to get my younger daughter who goes to a different school that starts later. On the way to take her to school, my wife calls me. “Have you taken her to school yet? Well, after you do, go pick up your son. He got in a fight.” I just assumed it was my oldest son. Imagine my surprise when I walked into the school office to see my younger son with a grin from ear to ear!
He was beaming! He pointed to another kid sitting in a chair holding an ice pack on his face. “I warned him,” he said. I was so proud. He had walked into class, sat down, and the kid popped him in the head like always. My older son got up to intervene and before he could, my younger son decked the kid with one punch.
He said the kid was bawling on the floor and that it was the best day of his life. He got suspended for three days. So yeah, I gave my son permission to beat up his tormenter because I didn’t think he would…and he did it. My son has some social anxiety and since the fight he has made a LOT of new friends. He used to hate going to school but now he’s disappointed that school is out for summer. Crazy!